Blocks omg ): so underprepared it's not even funny.
Let us run with all we've got this last round, our lungs feverishly sucking in air, our heads held up to the sky, our hearts beating, beating, bea-
Life! By the way, I'm at French nao... having a break (a legitimate one, not one I created out of nowhere hor) :O petit test is later :/ though I think I might pass -cough-. Aiya can one la!
My life... Oh, POP is over. Yeah. After POP, I see ma'ams less frequently for some reason ._. But _ said hi ^^ and after that I tried to be confident and said hi to another _... But she daoed me ;~; lol ide ._.
Btw I should confess that I've a tumblr (to be honest it accounts for half the time I spend on the computer :/) about snsd. Y'all feel free to judge me for I am BEYOND THAT.
OMG MY CAPS CANNOT TURN OFF.
OKAY I BLOG LIDDIS HAHA. ERM YES BLOCKS ARE AROUND THE CORNER... MAYBE EVEN RIGHT IN MY FACE AND SPILLING COFFEE OVER MY CLOTHES.
LOL BUT REVISION IS GOING BADLY :( I BLAME IT ON POP AND THE TRAUMATIC EFFECT IT BRINGS.
LE SIGH. BYE:(
Y'all never had to worry, because we will always care.
NOT A STALKER, just saying.
GAH FRENCH GAH BLOCKS GAH NDP REHEARSALS GAH brbdying.
ok, so 42 ma'ams have POP(p)ed. in fact, yesterday o_o though it really doesn't feel like they've left, but technically they're ex-ma'ams now (right?)
-insert gasp here-
because omg, i really cannot believe this. just yesterday, we were tiny cadets who felt lost amongst all the *cool* and *scary* ma'ams. today, we're NCOs (hmm) who feel lost... with no one to lean on anymore.
some things never change, huh ._.
yesterday during POP, i cried. twice, actually, if you count our performance. this is actually the first time. in many ways, it's not just because i'll miss ma'ams. it's also because they've been with us since we were the aforementioned tiny cadets, till now. it's also because we're alone now - just the 13 of us (and the rest of the unit la, but...)
AHAHA thanks _ for having AAGG links on your _ OMG I NOT A STALKER, _. i accidentally saw it.
omg my tooth's filling came out yesterday D: elaine MY TEETH REALLY BROKE ._. i bit on a fork when i wanted to bite on the thai otah lol wtf :/ and the filling came out argh (in primary school i fell and okay you don't want to know this) D: and one of my other teeth = shaky D: i think it's a baby tooth; apparently i didn't drop that many :O GAH oh no what if my tooth falls out and the new one haven't grow then my braces push the two teeth beside the fallen tooth together then OH NOOOOO. spoilt ._.
baiiii guys :)
I shall use an extended analogy (is there such a thing._. anyway I invent it if there isn't) for this post! If you get it, GOOD FOR YOU!; if you don't, erm, too bad I guess?
I shall start with a hint.
A few days ago I was trapped in a rut known as emoness, and it was a rather deep rut. However, not all deep ruts are hard to get out of, especially if you have a ladder in the rut like I did. The ladder in my rut was a monkey ladder, made out of Harry Potter 7, my friends who comforted me and today's activity (I raise my eyebrows and smirk at squadmates.)!
Therefore I've climbed out of the rut! REJOICE! :D
Also erm I have been eating a lot recently (irrelevant, but... yes) and confirm will gain weight one D:! Confirm! (Double confirm!) (omg so lame to quote Hossan Leong on my blog omg) Really I ATE A LOT; Saturday = bubble tea, Sunday = POPCORN BECAUSE OF HARRY POTTER + assorted porridge and breakfast before that, Monday = Weiting's house and thus: WEITING'S COOKIES AND MUFFINS AND LUNCH AND DINNER.
Oh goodness nevermind. I shall keep on deluding myself ._.
"Fiona hoho you ran 2.4 on Friday therefore it discounts everything."
Okay I gotta go! Do... something. GOSH I wish I could say revise, but I'm too tired to do so.
REVISE ): Or blocks = argh. Oh wait. POP rehearsals!! messed up my entire blocks revision schedule for this week -cries-
Gah I feel like a brick is crushing me and I can only climb out by the end of this week. Then another brick will fall on me and I can only escape after blocks. (See? Extended or not!)
MY MOTHER WENT TO PENANG :( I'm all alone... with the rest of my family members LOL ._.
bish why am i the go-to person for everything GOSH.
yall are busy; i am too.
I HATE BEING LIKE THIS. So wrapped up in my own misery it clouds my vision.
I KEEP TELLING MYSELF IT'S NOT LIKE THAT. I know it's not. Why am I still struggling with these scenarios that replay and replay and replay in my head?
AM I THE ONLY ONE WHO REMEMBERS? Is that how it is?
Moving on, since all of you did.
Changed my Facebook name.
POP + blocks + SIA presentations = drowning Fiona, but people think she's waving.
yesterday was one of the more interesting days i've had recently!
1) SIL - D.U.H Quiz.
^ HAHA I need to point out that D.U.H. stands for Demonstrating Understanding in the Humanities.
Okay moving on... I gallantly offered myself for the role! Actually Rachel (Er) was supposed to go, but she'd LOA ;_; So Jiachun our handydandy IH rep was trying to get out of going, and thus she started asking around.
To be honest, I didn't want to go alone ;_; (but it's an individual thing) On the other hand, I knew that I would regret it if I didn't go!
Therefore I somehow mustered up the courage and went "YESYES I SHALL GO". LOL ._.
But I was really fail ._. and picked weird topics :3 AND ARGHHHHH okay sorry guys.
2) NAPFA OMG
I'd 2.4 yesterday also! I GOT A C NO KIDDING. It's super good for my standard -cough- :D and it sort of makes up for my B in standingbroadjump D: These 2 years my NAPFA has always been AAAAA_, (I REFUSE TO REVEAL MY 2.4 GRADE) but this year it became AABAAC which is even better because I CAN HAS GOLD NAO :D
Argh Publications. Idek what to say anymoar ARGH. WHYYYYYYYYY WHYYYY tell me why oh goodness. Actually I know why ._. ma'ams already said ._. but still~ ): Functionz/Welfare ;_;
I'll get over it, I know I will. Meanwhile I shall just focus on the upcoming event and edit the _______ and do the audio and help in presents and think of more deco, thanks. -slightly.... overwhelmed-
Hohum but I shall be excited for _! :D
This is the point where I stand.
There is the point they stand.
Why are we so different?
just now i was packing all the letters i've received (2; one from 42 ma'ams for drill competition, the other from TW buddies! from taiwan omg) and so i took out my NDP'10 funbox (erm) which contains all the letters (most of them) i've received from people the past 2 years.
i felt... really nostalgic looking through them and reflecting on 213 life. i miss the connection, but everyone's busy and everyone's changed. i never expected that our relationship would stay the same; it's obvious that if you don't hang out together as much, your affection for each other would lessen to a certain degree. friends become acquaintances, acquaintances become strangers.
i just hope we'll never be strangers. the best thing for us would be of course,
to remain friends ^^
(guys when you're free let's go IC T_T)
I'm blogging now to attempt to wash down the *other* post -coughing-.
Okay so NCO interview is today! I think I did really weird ._. LOL. Ma'am thought I was hyperventilating when I was just laughing weirdly ._. and okay breathing weirdly also aiyo! I was really nervous and to diffuse the tension I was speaking all sorts of nonsense at the front. But I calmed down :D
Oh and LOL omg the random question is cool~ The one with the white paper with a dot in the middle [.] Somehow I thought of the Japan flag, but squadmates who got that thought of different stuff! Like target card (LOL), Yuqi's "dot" (creative max), etc.
Ah speaking of creativity! I SAID I WAS MOST CREATIVE OMG DAMN BUYAOLIAN LOL. I also said I was the most tech-savvy... which could be true/not. Truthfully I don't know la. I'm less of tech-savvy and more of "interested in fiddling with Photoshop and GIMP and gif-ing and rubbish like that". Although I know how to code... sorta (omg actually tbh I only know CSS okay this is bad)(please let me not be in Publications so diulian omfg)(OMG MA'AMS IF YOU SEE THIS, IDK HOW TO CODE REALLY D:).
Ahem. I want Welfare/Functionz! I think Weiting and I work well together and we're function-y people -is not hinting at all-.
Also... I thought the interview was really fun and stimulating, in a way! It hasn't been too long since I thought of what positions squadmates should take (LMSC ._.) and attempted to analyse all their traits. But it's hard to pin one squadmate down for one job... plus I will definitely be biased!! and all.
But come to think of it, ma'ams' opinion of us from the interview will also be slightly skewed... (except for me because I was honest!max)(hmm sorta. I was
politically correct diplomatic, but that's just me being passive-aggressive haha. The truth is underneath all that jazz ._.)(DID I JUST USE A WEIRD TERM LOL) because squadmates couldn't open up to ma'ams.
Aiyah anyway whatever la. Omg I said I was analytical and logical wtf! It's true I think, especially for NP ._. In NP I detach myself from the emotion (sometimes I can't though), so when something sad happens (POP._.) I don't even cry. I know I'm sad, or supposed to feel sad at least, but a part of me is just like "okay". I guess it's 'cause my passion for NP has been constantly... not that much (there I said it)(compared to squadmates). But come on you can't expect everyone to passionately love NP ._. I love the people in it, but it itself... hmm.
Anyway why would you care lolol. Does it matter? Sigh.
ITS NOT MY FAULT :/ I want to really care for things like NP but I'm a more people kinda person (god how bimbotic that sounded).
BTW SQMS FOR THE LAST TIME -le sigh- I AM NOT A BIMBO ._.
Ending off to do montage for _ _ _ hoho. Please squadmates let's make this werk~ okay bbai.
^ PLEASE TAKE A LOOK AT THE TITLE.
No I mean seriously. This is my NP schedule for the week.
Tuesday, AKA tomorrow: Quiz Team test, National Heritage test.
Wednesday: NCO interviews O_O
Friday: Campcraft test
And maybe you're like, that's not a lot -twirls hair- (lol at my fertile imagination ._.) but it is. To me, at least.
Maybe you don't understand the magnitude of these ^
Quiz Team test: determines placing in Quiz Team... also I'm trying desperately not to fail it and that's enough because OH GOSH WHY DID I EVEN -
National Heritage test: need to pass to get a badge
NCO interview: determines your position as a secondary4!
Campcraft interview: I'm bad at campcraft, PLUS also need to pass to get a badge.
Not to mention block tests are nearing~ and I've
barely not yet started on revision.
Right now... I'm chionging the National Heritage project ._. I'm making it really pretty... and you're probably going "WTF is wrong witchu, just copy and paste some whatevers and call it a DAY, qurl! You has moar to worry about" (Fiona is channeling her ghetto princess).
And you'd be right, of course! My priorities are really messed up. But the thing is, though, I tried studying for Quiz and National Heritage just now and failed.
This is basically what I did:
-reads some quiz stuff and tries REALLY REALLY REALLY hard to remember-
-fails at remembering-
-goes to national heritage and tries to remember-
SO to pull myself out of that rut I'd to do something else, namely the NH project, but I'm finding it difficult to stop putting so much effort in this project ._. I mean seriously look at this chiomax thing:
I v talented HAHAH! But that is not the point. The point is that (actually there's not really a point I'm just rambling on and on) I'm spending way too much time on something totally unnecessary and I'm neglecting the REALLY important stuff, like quiz/NH. Which, by the way, I'm going to fail.
And OKAY, this is really partially my fault, for not starting on NH sooner. But really, admit that the schedule up there is screwed! Say it!
Because in addition to whatever's that's up there, ma'ams are POPing (= resigning) on the 22nd, which is 2 weeks later. We've to organise the entire after-parade party/event in 2 weeks, including food, MCing, montage, getting alumni ma'ams to attend, getting TOs to attend, the programme, etc. Plus the performance.
And then after that it's Quiz prelims! And oh Drill Competition finals (if we do get).
AND YEAH BLOCKS.
So I'm quite overwhelmed. I suppose this is part of the experience huh?
-is ending abruptly because I need to get back to the project-
P.S. Sabrina talk to me T_T